WEBINAR SESSION 1: You’re Fired! (So Be Quiet)

Welcome to the Doing Life With Adult Children Coaching Webinar. Each week, you will login to this page at the course starting time and follow these steps below.

WATCH VIDEO: Click on the correct session number below and then play the short SESSION VIDEO. The video will appear on the website at the course start time. If you do not see the video play screen, wait until the start time, and then refresh your browser.
- Below the video play screen you will see interactive notes which you can fill in online or print at home to use while watching the video.
PERSONAL REFLECTION: At the end of the video, you will have a few minutes to read and/or discuss the Personal Reflection listed under the video notes.
INTERACTIVE WEBINAR: At 5:15pm PST on May 26, click THIS ZOOM WEBINAR LINK to join the discussion live with Jim and our other group participants.
- If you have any technical difficulties, please send an email to shawn@homeword.com.
OPTIONAL HOMEWORK: After our Coaching Zoom Webinar is finished, feel free to open the PDF at the bottom of the page where you will find additional discussion questions to continue exploring this week’s subject matter.

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Welcome to the interactive Digital Session Guide

This contains the teaching outline and personal reflection exercise.

You can use this section to take notes and answer questions. Your notes are private, no one from HomeWord can read them. When you are finished, you can download them, email them, or save them for later--don't leave the page without saving! If you prefer pen and paper, you can also download and print the notes.

<h1 class="p1">SESSION 1: You’re Fired! (So Be Quiet)</h1>
<h3 class="p2">Welcome to the Interactive Digital Session Guide</h3>
We created this guide to help you process and personalize Jim’s content. It contains two sections: Notes and Personal Reflection.
Use the first section to take your own notes during the video. Your notes are private and no one else can read them. We have also provided a downloadable PDF if you would like to print them.
Work through the questions in the second section at your own pace. We suggest you spend at least 15 minutes. The goal isn’t to finish quickly; instead, consider how these principles might impact your parenting and your life.
<h3 class="p6">Notes</h3>
PRINCIPLE ONE: Your role as the parent _______  _______. 
<ul class="ul1">
<li class="li3">You’re _______!</li>
<li class="li3">Give them the _______ __ _______. </li>
<li class="li3">Rewrite the script by _______ __ __ _______. </li>
<li class="li3">Be encouraging, ___ _______.</li>
<li class="li3">Be caring, but ___ _______ _______.</li>
<li class="li3">Invest in your emotional, physical, and spiritual _______. </li>
<li class="li3">Have serious _______. </li>
</ul>
PRINCIPLE TWO: Unsolicited advice is usually _______ __ _______.
<ul class="ul1">
<li class="li3">Ask ____________ _______.</li>
<li class="li3">Talk _______ _______, not __ _______.</li>
</ul>
<h3 class="p8">Personal Reflection</h3>
PRINCIPLE ONE: Your role as the parent must change. 
Describe your current relationship with your adult child(ren).
After investing two decades of your life in day-to-day parenting, in what ways are you surprised by your new role? 
From which aspects of parenting do you think you might need to be fired? What new roles do you need to implement? Be as specific as you can and provide examples. 
Jim said the new parenting role acts more like a consultant. In other words, your adult child needs to be making the most of their day-to-day decisions. What does that mean to you? What areas of your parenting relationship might have to change if you were more of a “consultant”? How might a “consultant approach” to parenting adult kids be helpful?
Does stepping into a less intrusive role make you feel like you’re losing control, or do you look forward to being less hands-on with your parenting?
How can you encourage your child’s attempts at adulting? Discuss wording that might be helpful.
There is often a grieving period after a relationship moves from adult/child to adult/adult. Jim said, “Letting go of your children must be counted as a necessary loss.” Make a list of the things you are going to miss. 
Adult children make great additions to the “big people” table. They’re clever, insightful, and energetic—so have fun! What do you enjoy doing with your grown kids? What steps could you take to have more serious fun with your adult child? How would you see this benefiting the relationship? 
While adjusting to a new parenting role, what are you doing to invest in your own emotional, physical, and spiritual health? What steps could you take to work on these areas of your life? 
PRINCIPLE TWO: Unsolicited advice is usually taken as criticism.
Describe a time when you tried to give your child(ren) advice, and they “turned” on you.
Offering unsolicited advice can make it seem like you’re stepping into your old pattern of parenting. What safeguards can you put in place to prevent offering unsolicited advice?
Does confessing to your kids, “Every time I throw my opinion around, I realize I put a wedge between us—and I’m sorry,” come easy to you? Why or why not?
When you were a young adult, how did you respond to unsolicited advice?
Why does it feel like it’s sometimes easier to give your kids advice rather than grace?
Does Ruth Graham’s story remind you of a time your own parents extended grace to you (or didn’t extend grace to you)? Share your experience. What did their actions communicate to you at the time?
Summarize in your own words what you think it might mean for you to “Keep Your Mouth Shut and the Welcome Mat Out.”
<h3><a style="color: #ff0000;" href="https://us02web.zoom.us/j/88399759453">Click HERE for the Zoom Webinar at 5:15 PST on May 26</a></h3>
<h3><a href="http://dlwac.s3.amazonaws.com/Webinar%20PDFs/DLWAC%20Webinar%20-%20Session%201.pdf" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Download Additional Questions from the Book</a></h3>

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